Of Pride and porn

Image: “Violet Blue at SF Pride” by Kevco.

The video is edited and up, the photos are posted and tagged and trussed up like little snacklets of my experience all weekend. The thoughts in my head are about politics and equality and coming back to some very interesting porn (as I describe in the video, which is NSFW), and I’m returning to a general sense of total creative frustration. I could have made the video work-safe and pride-only, especially with the KRON-4 footage and Gavin Newsom window dressing, but I thought, fuck it — this is my experience. Life contains boobs, and I am an adult — who happens to get mailed DVDs of things called Culos Gigantes and the new Penthouse.

In the video I mention the new Penthouse, which is really the most interesting men’s mag out there right now. The centerfold (Sasha Grey) looks like an American Apparel ad but explicit and shot by Terry Richardson; all their featured models are very pretty, some have tattoos (like the cover girl) and the features are quite good. It’s not your snooze-worthy bobble-head blonde, celebutard-packed Playboy, that’s for sure. I think it could use some more weird sex features and some sex and tech stuff, and they still need to lose that tired old men’s mag formula idea of “tricking girls” but it’s been picked up more than once here in the Blogger Bungalow, so there ya go.

Other porn I mentioned in my video are Man’s Ruin, Afrodite Superstar (preview) and Black Worm (post). I haven’t seen any of them yet, but they’re the most interesting ones I got this week.

The video from my weekend is embedded after the jump after a few choice photos and some commentary about my experiences and observations. My creative frustrations will be explained over the next few posts after this one…

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Starting with the Trans March, which we escaped during for drinks — Jonathan Moore, me, Jonno:


I spent time with my adopted mom Theresa Sparks and her adorable biological daughter (my new sis!):


Saturday, Frank Chu in the Dyke March!


And in case you’re wondering why every photo I have of the Dyke March (where I fell in lust with a random girl on the street, alas) from the house party I was at on 16th Street has *everyone* looking up and grinning, it’s because me and two other hot girls were yelling “show us your tits!” and giving them MUCH inspiration:


Then on sunday, the Alice B. Toklas LGBT Democratic Brunch, where I met (and re-met some) of our elected officials. Tom Ammiano and Mark Leno remembered me; the DA Kamala Harris looked like she was about to pee herself when Theresa told her I was a sex writer. Awkward for her, amusing for me. She said, “Oh! Uh, you, uh, just keep doing what you’re doing!” then she got away quickly. Whatever. I still don’t see anyone I identify with in any political realm and that’s lame. It’s like the world of news anchors — I’d never hang out with them, they’re like from another planet. Not like normal people. Anyway, there were Hilary Clinton buttons on all the tables, but no one wore them; lots of people had Edwards stickers on, and Elizabeth Edwards gave a moving speech about how she became friends on an online forum (after her son died) with a lesbian woman whose partner had been critically injured in a car wreck, and was shut out from the entire process of her lover dying by the family. Even down to having the locks on their apartment changed; Mrs. Edwards recounted living through the awfulness of the woman’s experience to the room. It was quite a moving speech. Then she talked about how no candidates are supporting marriage equality (“which include the 11,000 rights under marriage laws”). I was at the table with my family, and we all remarked that it’s too bad she’s not the one running for president. Too bad it’s their wives that have to make them all seem human.


Then, riding in the parade with Theresa and the SFPD:



Here’s my beautiful sister while we waited in line for the VIP after party at City Hall. This shot was with my Helio Ocean (which I love in the complex way of gadget amour):


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Wikipedia traffic metrics: Sex ed top in searches

There’s a wee post over on a traffic metrics blog showing that sex (sex ed, especially) is high in Wikipedia search rankings, beating music and movies, and tying with “pop culture”. I wish the author would have included specifics on which sex ed topics are being searched for. But it does show that people are hungry for accurate sex info over titillation, and all that abstinence education, despite the government’s best efforts, is still a big waste. People are going to seek out sex ed no matter what — and that’s a very good thing.

I spent time at a party last weekend with two local pathologists, asking them what they find in people’s butts. The answers were *scary*. So please, please — Wikipedia for all!

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Meditations on Metropolis

Hey — I’m still here. I have lots of photo and video to upload and a column to write; I had quite a weekend. Yes, to those of you who emailed — that was me with those cute girls in that window on 16th Street, flashing our boobies to the cheering dyke march. Yes — I saw Elizabeth Edwards speak (from the table next to the stage; we all agreed she should run instead of her husband). Yes, over the weekend I got another email from someone who wants me to die for talking about sex (a guy who wants me put out of my misery). And yes, I was in the parade with my mom Police Commissioner President Theresa Sparks, and Gavin right behind us, and yes, I met like a zillion officials (DA, police chief, etc) and hung out with oodles of happy and proud LGBT SFPD officers. I also met the gang task force head and had some interesting discussions. And bizarrely, all weekend I was constantly recognized by someone I didn’t know everywhere I went. I’ve been in the world of politics and high-profile discussions of issues like equality and discrimination, and laughing/rubbing shoulders with people who are devoting their lives (and personal safety) to creating positive change. I’ve been understanding a new kind of love and strength and loyalty, and a new kind of hate and ignorance.

So I’m getting slowly back to work here, catching up on the tech world and media I’ve missed, and thinking about a lot of stuff.

Anyone see Metropolis recently? It’s one of my favorite films of all time, and I know it quite well. I just saw this post, and all I can think is, “Eternal Gardens”, anyone?

This is the Metropolis wiki page; an overly wordey review but concise description of the Eternal Gardens is here on Not Coming; this is a fabulous fansite.

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It’s gay Christmas!

In San Francisco this weekend — it’s Pride, and I have a pretty heavy schedule. I don’t mean to lazyweb my way through with lots of image and random video posts, but I might: check my Flickr page and my show page if I don’t get to update here in the next 24. Tonight: trans march, tomorrow dyke march sideline boobie-flashing, sunday I have a VIP brunch, then I’m in a convertible with my mom Theresa Sparks (SFPD Police Commission President) in the contingent right before Gavin Newsom, surrounded by about 200 LGBT cops (omg, hot women with sidearms!). Then, another VIP reception and hopefully an oxygen tank/margarita IV drip combo — and oh you know my TX1’s battery is *charged*. And Jonno‘s here, yaaaayyyy!

Last night I met Duane Cramer (Flash site) and this beautiful model; posted here and here. I really appreciated that for his current Shadow + Light erotic photo show, he included a straight couple (PFLAG) to complete the diversity he believes Pride stands for — “to represent our straight allies and supporters”.

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Christian spanking porn

Sex writer Greta Christina is quite unnerved by the very real spanking practices in certain fundamentalist christian “biblical marriages” — and she wrote an (ahem) heavy-handed post about it on the Blowfish blog. They even have their own “romantic spanking fiction” for “Christian Domestic Discipline marriage”. Interesting, no?

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[Video] Sex toy gifts from Good Vibes


Good Vibes (my former employer) asked me to their warehouse a week ago to give me some toys they thought I might enjoy reviewing. I got some very funny video out of it, both there and when I got home, including a cameo or two by my very wary cat, Alex.

Side info mentioned in the video: Japanese vibrators are extremely high quality; they have the best, most reliable motors. Most sensation creams (like clit ‘tingling’ creams) have arginine in them, which causes flare-ups for people with herpes (so Good Vibes made their own with *no* arginine).

They gave me so much fun stuff I’ve only *begun* my adventures:

The Cone, the JimmyJane Little Chroma (love it), the Sidekick, Hand Cream, a Goldfrau, a Sprocket, a Rippler, Zing Pleasure Cream, a Blackberry Ring and Good Lubrications Warming Gel.

The Cone — omg, the pamphlet that comes with it is *hilarious*. In one image for suggested use, it’s a silhouette of a woman in high heels with the Cone pressed between her and a wall — as if she sat on the Cone, it got wedged in her hoo-hah, and she backed into the hallway like a cat trying to escape a — cone. Total party favor. So far I’ve only tried the Little Chroma, and it’s fantastic. Great for partnered sex, and an *excellent* clit vibe. But then again, JimmyJane has the lustiest, coolest vibes going these days; I did this Fleshbot post on their ultra designer line last week, with art by (Tank Girl and Gorillaz artist) Jamie Hewlett. So hot. Oh, and while I’m on the subject of new sex gear I like, while I was at GV I bought some Silk, a new lube, which I think I might like even better than Liquid Silk, even though the former seems to be riffing off the name. Regardless, they’re both great, top-shelf lubes.

The video is on this show page, and embedded after the jump.

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Viva la revolucion: Mah sexy SF Pride Guide

This week’s column on the SFGate/Chron is Ten Ways to Get Lubed in San Francisco, which is a very grownup Pride visitor’s guide, but is also a handy resource for seeing the sexy sights whenever you visit. The Gate turned on comments for this column, and I just made the mistake of reading them. People can really be mean, even over such a fluffy column. Can I go through one week without people being cruel to me? Nope. Though, I did get a very complimentary private email from the Board President of the SF LGBT Pride Celebration Committee — and a friend emailed, “Come on, the hate of uncool people is frequently more satisfying than
the love of the cool. Girl, you know it’s true.”

Still, it’s nice to discover in the comments that I’m a tool of the revolutionaries, just as you’ve all suspected. I’m leaving the house now to go get some tough(er) love from Thomas. He likes to poke my thick skin until I giggle, or slap him, whichever comes first. It’s how we show affection in the revolution. Snip:

San Francisco is a sexual wrinkle in the space-time continuum. There are many theories on why we seem to be the epicenter of all things bawdy, naughty, dirty and just plain sexy. Some cite history: the famed Barbary Coast days, when the streets boasted ladies in breeches and inexpensive company of all flavors, and sailors were, um, sailors. We had the biggest red-light district in the world for at least a decade. The term “mack” even originated here: French pimps brought girls here by the literal boatload, and the French word for pimp (or “broker”) — maquereau — became shortened on our fine shores to “mack.” As in, San Francisco is your Mack Daddy this weekend.

Theories also abound on why we’re a sexual vortex: those good ol’ maritime ways, how sweaty we all get walking up and down those hills, the weather (fog’s ability to make the Castro into a continual, hard-nipped wet T-shirt contest), the infestation of sex educators, those damn beatniks, those damn hippies, liberal mayors, conservative papers, too much fresh air … oh, and those damn homos. Definitely related to the homos.

Well, at least it is this lovely Pride Weekend, and we’re all better off for it. Because we may not be able to nail down exactly why San Francisco is so sexually encouraging, tolerant, smart and hot all over, but we certainly know how to throw a few parties in celebration of self-determined sexuality as a very normal human birthright. So if you’re in town this weekend for our beloved Pride Parade or Pink Saturday, or just to hang out and marinate in our cherished rainbow stew — and you’re curious about seeing more than the plentiful queergasmic family fare on hand, your only quandary is narrowing down your choices. Get your official Pride events here (hotel and visitor guide is here), but do consider a few well-lubed, quite adult picks from your native sex columnist (…)


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