I love pretty happy girls

I’m still on the Hegre affiliate mailing list; mostly out of curiosity to see the new models and nice erotic photos, and also to see what Richard Kern is up to — he’s one of my top ten favorite erotic photographers. They send me links to free galleries every week but I usually think they’re just okay. But the ones they sent me a few days ago have some really sexy girls and nice, hi-res photos of happy hotties having fun for the camera in well-shot, nicely composed explicit photosets.

I really liked Karli, Tess, Viktoria, Ivette, Sian (especially for readers who ask me for unshaved girls), and Nastik. They don’t usually send me so many just plain lovely women (also European and un-anorexic, not porn Barbies) and the erotica is like free, so I felt it was worth a mention, plus anything to make monday easier… Now, if I could just find a sexy male version of this.

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[Video] iPod iPorn

Very fun video in the style of those ubiquitous iPod commercials; if anyone knows the source please email so I can give proper link credit. I found it on YouTube, but no one cites where they found it. Regardless, it’s like someone filmed me before, during and after the (400 people; almost all Chinese) wedding last night. (Except for the part with the fire extinguisher, seriously. My head is killing me.)

Get your iPorn on after the jump!

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Off To A Wedding Reception

bathroom photo
Earlier today I went to a pirate radio planning meeting; there’ll be some fun stuff coming up for me in the next few months with these guys. I was blown away listening to them describe going to Serbia and setitng up a pirate radio station in someone’s apartment a few months ago — and leaving it there, fully operational, to this day. So cool.

Now I have to go to a wedding reception; I’m all ready so I took a few quick pics in my bathroom before heading out. (A couple more here.) Looks like I’m going to have to keep an eye on my cleavage in this dress, unless I want someone’s dirty old uncle having a heart attack into the appetizer buffet… It’ll be tough to remember to keep checking my boobs because I’m still recovering from last night; sweetie bunny angel pie Jonno is in town and we’ve been *majorly* hititng the gay bars at night; last night was a 3am drinkfest, complete with old gay men squeezing me two-handed at Moby Dick’s, telling me I looked ‘fabulous’ in my Bettie Page wig and tight black leather push-up top… phew. Now, off to an open bar! It sure is nice not being on a deadline for a minute.

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[Video] Pinky violence: Sex and Fury

pinky violence
I am in love, love, love with my newest discovery, the bad girls’ exploitation Pinky Violence series: Reiko Ike stars as a female Japanese Yakuza killing machine, who appears to do many of her kick-ass fight scenes in the nude, revealing her stunning chest and shoulder tattoos! (Did I forget to mention the squad of switchblade-wielding naked nuns?) One look at the sex-drenched trailer, with its eerily familiar looking fight scenes and you can see where quite a bit of Kill Bill was ripped off from; the 1973 Sex and Fury movie is a mind-blowing testament to ultra-sexy women assasins with swords.

Dig the fucking amazing “boots are made for walkin” action after the jump! Definitely for fans of Faster Pussycat, Kill! Kill!

Here’s the Panik House text:

Sex & Fury, one of the wildest, most violent, just-plain-entertaining Japanese sexploitation pictures from the 1970s stars smoldering young ‘pinky violence’ actress Reiko Ike (veteran of the Girl Boss aka Sukeban film series) as Ocho, a gambler and pickpocket in Meiji Era Tokyo. After sheltering a fleeing anarchist, Ocho encounters the three villains responsible for her father’s murder, and runs afoul of various yakuza who want her dead. A European spy (beautiful Christina Lindberg, star of Thriller – A Cruel Picture), whose sadistic diplomat boss has his own nefarious plans, complicates matters. A riproaring action saga filled with beautiful bodies, bloody swordplay, and psychedelic imagery — all beautifully photographed in a number of astonishing setpieces. Directed by Norifumi Suzuki (who fathered the Sukeban genre), Sex & Fury transcends the pop culture realm to achieve genuine art. Followed by the outrageous sequel, Female Yakuza Tale – Inquisition & Torture (also available from Panik House), it’s the best film you’ve never seen!

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The horrifying repercussions of steamybutt

I want that to be the title of my first children’s book, or a new Extra Action song, or a book with the subhead, ” — the George W Bush Presidency”. It’s from Rectal Foreign Bodies, an old site with real and fake stuff, via Kinkwire Forums.

And, wow — what is it with cock shots on Craigslist for ads in or around Colorado Springs, home of ultraconservative Focus on the Family? Focus on the… focus… trying to focus…. big blurry cock…. must… focus… You go, CoSprings CL!

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Music madness

flag girl butt
I cherry-picked a bunch of excellent mashups from M*A*S*H and The Food. Apologies to Bootie LA, who just gave me a copy of their great CD, but I think The Food’s What I Diggity Say (Ray Charles vs. Blackstreet) has got to be one of the best mashups I’ve ever heard and certainly the most amazing mashup of 2006. In the same R&B vein, I loved Work Out My Number (Beyonce vs. Ernest Raglin). I also liked their Callin’ it Black (ACDC vs. local rapper Lyrics Born). M*A*S*H has the awesomely mixed Put on the Super Freak (Rick James vs. Police), Doncha Dance (Pussycat Dolls vs. David Bowie vs. Busta Rhymes), and the discolicious My Salsoul Humps (Carol Williams vs. Black Eyed Peas).

But wait, there’s more: I really miss the Extra Action Marching Band, who have been on hiatuts to hibernate in a cave all winter like oversexed rabid bears — so I uploaded a handful of videos I took of EA last year to YouTube. You’ve probably already seen a couple of these, but here they are:

Extra Action rehearsal of Burning Down the House with David Byrne * short video of Burning Down the House finale * more Fillmore: flag girls onstage * Extra Action covers Black Sabbath at Galapagos in New York

Bonus: my short video of ultrahot burlesque dancer Kitten DeVille onstage at Tease-A-Rama.

Photo: flag girl bootie, backstage at the Fillmore before the show.

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[Video] Bettie Page, old and new

nude bettie
Bettie Page is having yet another revival — though now, a totally Hollywood one — with the April release of The Notorious Bettie Page (Flash site, LAME!). I am glad that at least she’s being played by Gretchen Mol and not Liv Tyler, even though I can think of like ten non-famous, non-Hollywood burlesque dancers that would be awesome (and perfectly bootylicious) Betties. Mol, sadly, does not fill out the ruffle-butt panties of legendary Page.

Boing Boing recently pointed us to a new article interviewing Page, “Bettie Page in LA Times“, where she tells us that the BDSM work she did for Irving Klaw was only for the money, and that she derived no enjoyment for this token she had to exchange for the cash she got doing other modeling for Klaw. I seriously doubt that anyone who showed the life, excitement, enthusiasm and exuberance for fetish, catfights, bondage and spankings as she did would have been just going through the motions. Click on any number of porn sites and you can see a bajillion girls going through the motions to make a buck; no one made it look as fun, sexy and hot as Page did. What needs to mentioned in context with Page’s statements about her BDSM work is her post-modeling conversion to conservative Christianity — this informs us about her (public) perspective on her former work. Her new values require an internal division with what’s in confilct with those values. But, whatever — her old videos are fucking hot, and she had the bestest body, and looked delectable in bondage. I’d trade places with Bettie Page of old, right now, in a red hot minute.

Think I’m ranting? Maybe. But check out the videos of her in action, the trailer for the upcoming film, and see at least one *extremely creepy* rumored Page stag film, after the jump.

Update, reader comment:
> My friend [redacted] went to a screening of that Bettie Page
> movie at the Playboy Mansion, with the real Bettie Page in
> attendance. She said that Bettie heckled the entire movie,
> complaining about inaccuracies all the way through!

Photo via the nudes at bettiepage.com.

Bettie’s hot silent “fireplace dance” — no nudity, but she doesn’t need to get naked for us to see what’s missing from modern porn:

Terrible music, but here’s Bettie enjoying bondage and spanking that is beyond hot (short video):

Majorly creepy because ventriloquist dummies are like clowns: this pseudo-stag film supposedly stars Bettie — what do you think, is it her?

The trailer for The Notorious Bettie Page, which I’m totally going to go see:

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